Struggling for a visa

Back again in winter cold Germany alone becoming impatient for the day to welcome Bebeth at Frankfurt airport. Those months were unbearably long and the recollection of the nice time in Surigao warmed and comforted me. The list of required papers and documents for marriage visa application is very long. Actually 2 authorities were involved this time: the German Embassy and the Civil Registry Office.

The Embassy was the worst agency as it couldn't help but even sending one of its trusted lawyers to Bebeth's house to carry out an investigation about her. The birth certificate, the certificate of being single and the Parental's concern needed to be certified up to three times until accepted by the Embassy. She had to bring a clearance from the NBI, a statement of good moral from a Barangay Captain, and school and college reports. Yes, even the certificate of baptism was officially required. The funniest thing was a "whole body photo" and I was about to ask if it was with or without clothes on...... so silly. Well, all of these consumed lots of money, nerves and time of course Bebeth had to travel to Manila twice. Fortunately we had sought for support by a specialized agency in Manila run by an Austrian citizen named René. They cared about the certification of official papers by the Office of the President of the Philippines and the Department of Foreign Affairs (DFA). During her stays in Manila Bebeth could reside at René's family this time, at least saving lots of money for a hotel room.

The requirements of the CRO were less complicated, as it was mainly interested in Bebeth's identity and her really being single thus being able to marry me. Together with her marriage visa it wasn't too difficult anymore. The only problem was, that some of documents were needed by the Embassy *and* the CRO at the same time, so it is recommendable to get these in original twice to avoid confusion and save time. The birth certificate and the Certificate of being single which must be certified (up to) 3 times, must also be checked by the high court (Oberlandesgericht), before the CRO accepts its validity. As you can guess, this also wasn't for free...

Actually things were more complicated than I like to explain it here. The wedding was already planned for July 23 but things took much more time than expected again. I never ceased from asking the Department of Foreign Affairs for assistance, too. Maybe this was the reason why after a while the processing went very fast suddenly. When Bebeth went to the Embassy for applying for her visa, she was already known there so she wasn't even required to present for all those documents we had collected over time, and her application was already approved. They had checked already the papers needed for the CRO, so they waived to see the other ones. Needless to say that we both were rather amazed and I was a way angry as we could have saved lots of efforts actually. But I'm sure, that if we missed to bring one paper, this particular one will be wanted definitely... Murphy's law.

I can't really remember exactly how long it took until the Embassy finally sent an SMS (very modern indeed) to Bebeth informing her to come and pick up her visa. This time she didn't even need a special appointment date, amazing. On her way back she attended the prescribed counseling seminar for Filipinas going abroad at the CFO (Commission on Filipinos Overseas), so eventually she was prepared to come to Germany. Uhm, did I write "prepared"? Today, I really doubt if she was… Lots of hints and tips were collected by helpful friends online that I had found on a forum, but somehow I didn't have the feeling that she took them seriously.

Note from Bebing: To all Filipinas who wish to marry a foreigner and settle down abroad, it is advisable to leave behind at home 90% of your customs and traditions. You must have the strong will to integrate in the foreign land's culture and social interactions otherwise it will be your lives' irreversible failure.

During all the time we chatted online and txt'ed daily, but we rarely phoned because the reception was of bad quality. We sometimes chatted for hours, though. This was possible because of my more or less regular financial support through bank transfer of funds. We never had big quarrels, except once or twice. I knew that she was into cell phones and other electronic gadgets, but when she asked me for a specific model she was dreaming of, it pissed me off as it was even more expensive than mine and her necessity to have it was unexplainable. Today, I know that a new model of a cell phone is a matter of yabang - some kind of status symbol in the Philippines. Slowly I got the impression that she was rather materialistic.

Quite a few other things also needed to be settled before we could think about her moving to Germany. In March a message shocked me saying that she had a traffic accident. A tricycle driver had overlooked her car and hit it at the right side. Fortunately only the car was affected while she wasn't hurt at all (thank God!), but of course some support was needed to pay the repair. The practiced traffic rules in Surigao seem to be quite different from western rules, as the bigger vehicle obviously goes first regardless of the direction where it comes from.

Another problem were her teeth which had been troubling her for quite a while. Considering the very high costs for dentists and dentures in Germany we had agreed of her taking care about this issue while still being in the Philippines. Although she had some kind of health insurance it didn't cover such costs so I took over again. As many people in the Philippines cannot afford good treatment of damaged teeth those are mostly removed simply leaving ugly gaps behind, in some cases. Surely the best treatment was just good enough for my fiancée.

Note from Bebing: In rural areas, old people practice traditional dental hygiene to strengthen their teeth. They chew a coarsely pounded betel nut with a pinch of lime rolled in a mint-flavor leaf. After a while of chewing whole area mouth becomes red and the saliva is spitted out.

The current electricity and telephone bills also needed to be cared for...